Booby Juice

Happy 3rd Birthday Lucas!

I know, I know -- can you believe Lucas is 3 years old?  Imagine how I feel!  I started this blog when Lucas was just 5 months old and I've been writing about our family life ever since. 

For those of you who have been reading boobyjuice for a while, you will know much of what I am about to say.  For those of you who are new to boobyjuice, enjoy!

Here it goes....

Lucas, you have been in our lives for 3 years (that's 36 months or 1,095 days) and I have been in total awe of you since I first laid eyes on your pointy head and wrinkled, lanky body.  You were a wonderful baby and have grown into an exceptional little boy.

There is not a day that goes by that you don't amaze me with your Lucasisms, your sweet disposition, your ferocious curiosity or your love for life.  But best of all, there is not a day that goes by that you don't inspire me -- I am inspired to learn all that I can; to try new things; to look at the world objectively all over again; and to be the best mom, the best wife, the best person I can be.

There is so much about you now that I hope to remember forever.....  Your unconditional love of all things motorized, the endearing way you bend into your brother when you play with him, the way you get excited when I come home at the end of the day, the way you put your fingers to your mouth to '"rest," the way you don't let me leave your room at night without telling me how much you love me.... I could go on and on.

To watch you grow and mature has been such a joy.  You are so exceptional now, I can't imagine what the future holds for you.  Happy birthday cuttie pie!

It's a sad day when....

...you are trying to do something good for yourself by getting off your butt to go for a bike ride and you get accosted by a group of gang kids who decide to hang out on the jogging/bike path, ramming into bikers as they try to make their way through the group, and throwing rocks at your back when you do make it past.

I believe the exact words I heard as the rock went whizzing past my head were, "You almost got that bitch."

If I didn't have kids of my own and if I had had a death wish, I would've spun around so fast and given those little sh*ts a piece of my mind.  What has become of our youth?

Overscheduled Mom

Saturday morning - Little Gym

Saturday afternoon - Birthday party

Saturday night - Host dinner party for 2 other families (including four children)

Saturday late night - Clean up after dinner party

Sunday morning - Birthday party

Sunday afternoon - Crash with kids

Sunday evening - Take boys to get their pictures taken

Sunday night - Thank God the week-end is over

Weighed down

When I go into the office, I usually head out of the house with my pump and cooler on one shoulder and my purse and laptop bag on the other.  If I had a quarter for every comment I received about being weighed down, or needing another bag, or what could I possibly need in all those bags, I would have the boys' college education paid for twice over.

So when I left for the office today with just my purse and laptop bag, it was totally surreal.  I'm still on the fence about whether to wean when Justin turns a  year next month, though I'm admittedly leaning towards extended breastfeeding (don't tell Husband -- he wants his oobies back!), I did decide at the very least to wean myself from the pump and let nature run its course.

I will continue to nurse first thing in the morning, in the evenings and of course at bedtime and through the night when needed, but I'm not sure I will nurse during the days once Justin hits one year.  I will probably introduce cow's milk in a sippie during the day and leave boobyjuice for those other times.

During the day in passing, I thought about pumping at the time when I would have been making my way back for my morning pump, but then I didn't think about it again until I was leaving for the day.  When I left the office and walked passed the "quiet rooms" where I used to pump, I was sad.  Don't get me wrong, I won't miss being hooked up to a pump 3-4 times a day, but not pumping during the day is indicative of the looming end to my breastfeeding days.... 

Am I being too melodramatic???

The good thing is that my boobs felt pretty good even without pumping all day, though on the way home they were so full that when I had a letdown they started to burn.  And I was so thrilled when I got home and Justin dropped everything and instantly began whining for the oobies. 

Wean?  I'm not so sure.

Extended Breastfeeding

As Justin's first birthday furiously approaches, I am left with a sinking feeling.  Not only will my baby soon be a toddler, but I am struggling with whether to wean or head down the extended nursing path.

My reasons for wanting to wean are admittedly selfish:  I want to get Lasik and they won't even look at me until 2 months after completely weaning; I want to be able to travel without a pump; I'm tired of looking at enormous, swollen, sagging oobies; I want to be able to fit into normal sized tops; and I want to see if I will lose any of my stubborn baby weight once the hormones level out and return to "normal."

But then there are the emotionally compelling reasons for continuing to breastfeed:  I love breastfeeding and the amazing bond Justin and I have when he is nursing; when Justin wakes in the middle of the night nursing not only soothes him, but also allows me to sleep while doing so; Justin in no way seems ready to give up the boobyjuice; I am not sure I am ready to give up breastfeeding, especially because there might not be another opportunity for me to breastfeed ever again....

To look at Justin and know that I have breastfed him for 351 days is an amazing feeling.  It feels so good, in fact, that I can't imagine looking at him and not knowing that I am still breastfeeding him.  Justin's first birthday is exactly 14 days away, and while I have no hard and fast rule that says I must make a decision whether to wean or not within those 2 weeks, there is not  a day that goes by that I don't think about that decision.  Probably because I know that if I do decide to wean, it is going to be one of the hardest decisions I've had to make in a long time.

Out to lunch...

Sorry I haven't kept up with things over the past week.  I was traveling for work last week, came  home Friday night at midnight, left Saturday morning at 5:00 AM for a long week-end in Puerto Rico (with Husband and no kids!!!), got home late yesterday evening, put the kids to bed and was up until 2:00 AM trying to catch up on work. 

As soon as I can catch my breath, I will post some updates.

On the road again

Nonna came home last night, just in time for me to head out today for 2 days in Houston for work.

Days 3 through 7 while Nonna were gone are a blur....  Justin had green snotties.  Then double pink eye (which he picked up from Lucas).  Another double ear infection.  A round of antibiotics.

Follow up today: puss is gone.  Continue antibiotics for the full 10-day course.  Oh, but Justin is cutting 6 teeth. Alternate Tylenol and Motrin for relief.

I knew he was teething, but six teeth?  Explains why Justin has been waking up in hysterics in the middle of the night.  Nonna has her work cut out for her while I'm gone.  Glad she's well rested from her week away!

What have I gotten us into?

I still can't walk right.  Saturday, Husband and I had our first hill training and I am still trying to recover.  When we got home after 2 hours of bike riding up hills, I could barely walk up my stairs to my bedroom, where I crawled under the covers futilely trying to get the kids to go to sleep so I could, too.  Lucas obliged, but Justin put up a fight.

Half way around our first go at the trail, I knew I wasn't going to make it 4 times around, which was the plan.  I fell off my bike the week before (at mile 21.5 of a 22-mile ride) after my front tire slipped out from under me on a chunk of black ice, and apparently my legs are still paying the price.  In fact, I could only do one of the two hills on my bike, and embarrassingly had to walk the last 3/4 of the way up the second hill.  How am I going to complete a 10-mile hill, and not just one of them but two 10-mile hills?

After three times around the trail, I was too pooped to continue.  I was really disappointed in myself, not because I physically couldn't complete the day's training, but because I have not been as disciplined as I should in practicing during the week.  I grossly overestimated my physical abilities while grossly underestimating my free time.

So now what?  Well I have never been one to quit, particularly when it's for something that is so near and dear to my heart, so Husband and I have made a commitment to buckle down.  Really buckle down.  Which begs the question, why am I sitting here in front of my laptop????

Happy Belated 11 month birthday Justin!

We're almost there -- the big O-N-E.  Yesterday was Justin's 11-month "birthday" and he is still one of the happiest babies I know, though he's had a rough week (double pink eye, green snotties and Friday we learned he has a double ear infection).  And I am proud to report that I have made it 11-months of breastfeeding and Justin is still going strong.

Justin continues to be an eating machine, forgoing baby food in favor of table food.  And he doesn't want any food specially prepared for him, he wants what the rest of us are eating.

He and Lucas still have a wonderful relationship -- Justin's face lights up when Lucas walks into the room.  And all is takes is for Lucas to smile in Justin's direction to send Justin into deep, belly hysterics.  It is the cutest, most wonderful sight I have ever seen.

We've been doing sign language with Justin for a couple months and he is now spontaneously signing.  He signs milk, more, food/eat and hat, and he can mimic virtually all of the signs he sees.  Lucas loves to watch the videos with Justin, so it's a real boon when Lucas signs to Justin.

I am admittedly worried about a couple aspects of Justin's physical development.  While he is rolling over without any problems, pulling himself up on furniture and cruising around the coffee table and sofas, Justin has absolutely no interest in crawling or saying intelligible words.  Justin won't even stay on his knees for longer than a split second....  He will gladly lie on his belly and reach and squirm for toys we put just out of his reach, but he doesn't attempt any sort of coordinated movement to get to the toy.  And I can say, "Mama, Mama, Mama" over and over again with only an occasional "Mmmmm" in response. 

What Justin can't get enough of is walking, which is all fine and good except he can't walk without holding on to someone's fingers.  So, that means if Justin wants to walk, then I have to walk.  Or Husband has to walk.  Or Justin's current favorite walking buddy, my dad.  In fact, Justin wants to walk so much that it is virtually impossible to sit the kid down, unless of course there is food in front of him, but even then it's sometimes difficult when he has that walking feeling!

But even with all of the walking, as I look back over the past 11 months, it has been an absolutely wonderful experience having Justin in our lives.  When I was pregnant with him, I wondered how I could possibly love a second child as much as I loved Lucas, and now I know.